See you now;
Your bait of falsehood takes this carp of truth:
And thus do we of wisdom and of reach,
With windlasses and with assays of bias,
By indirections find directions out:
So by my former lecture and advice,
Shall you my son. You have me, have you not?
In tonight’s episode of “The Nightly New(t)s”, this eastern spotted expresses surprise at the number of conservatives wishing to sleep with Caitlyn Jenner, seeing no other explanation for why humans care so much about what’s under clothing.
What do you call a swimming baby owl?
A moist-owlette
How do we know that owls are smarter than chickens?
Ever heard of Kentucky-fried owl?
When does a Owl go “quack”?
When it is learning a new language.
What do you get when you put a bee in front of an owl?
A bowl!
What happened when the owl got a sore throat?
He didn’t give a hoot.
“Knock, Knock”
“Who’s there?”
“Who…”
“Who, who?”
“Who, who, who, who?”
“Who, who, who, who, who?”
“Who, who, who, who, who, who?”
“Who, who, who, who, who, who, who?”
“Who, who, who, who, who, who, who, who?”
What happened to the owl that fell in the well?
It got wet.
This owl doesn’t think any of these jokes are funny and is losing respect for you for laughing.
Not content with pointing out the flaw in calculation showing that bees couldn’t fly, this bee shows it can perform under load.
The race was on.
The enemies were approaching the hive and reinforcements were needed. Two hundred and twenty five meters was a long way, but it was necessary. The invaders must be stopped.
Only a quarter of the way and she was already getting tired. Still, the thought of the costs of her failure, drove her forward. Fifty thousand lives depended on her. And one two hundred and twenty five meters.
Glancing backward, she saw the invaders massing on the horizon and increased her speed. She realized she wouldn’t make it in time if she held anything back. She need not make the return trip. Conveying the message was enough. If the other hive could be alerted, they just might make it in time.
As she passed the three quarters point, she powered on, burning the last of her energy for the final stage of the race. She felt, deep in her body, that this was the end. When she reached her destination, she knew she’d just be able to deliver her message and, quite likely, collapse and die.
Death, however, was practically a guarantee in either case. If she stayed and fought, she would be slain with tens of thousands of others. If she was too slow, again, tens of thousands would die. If she just stopped, she might survive, but she might be the only one. No. Her only hope was to alert the others, in the hopes that they could help keep the total casualties low.
Though it may cost her life, she must fly.
You forgot to depress the lever, didn’t you?
When put into Park, the pelican’s bill is locked in place, preventing accidental slippage. Before changing gears, it is imperative to depress the lever and safely unlock the bill. Otherwise, the bill can become damaged.
When forced to fight, the American turkey can deploy it’s razor-sharp feathers to help convince predators to pursue easier prey.
These fish are clearly too spicy. They should be thrown back.
When they’re young, to prevent accidental injury, oryx parents put corks on the horns of their children.
The closest I’ll likely get to photographing an emu tongue.
O sister, were you Empresse of the world,
Æneas well deserues to be your loue,
So lovely is he that where ere he goes,
The people swarme to gaze him in the face.
Reflection of crane reflecting on how the lack of Patellar reflexes in reflexive knees reflects upon his species.
Western banded geckos are a common choice for beginner lizard climbers. This is largely due to the easy footholds, the relatively low slope and the easily accessible resting cave that can serve as a basecamp.
“Water, water, every where, nor any drop to … hey, wait a minute!”
It’s hard to get a mate as a bird. You must keep your feathers in perfect order, defend your territory, and have a perfect song. You must excel in your conformity.
Some birds, however, give up on the process completely and build their own mate. Piece. By. Piece.
He doesn’t like being old.
He is upset at how the world has changed.
He hates the kids today.
He is angry that the lifestyles he was not permitted in his youth are now considered acceptable.
He doesn’t understand why his jokes aren’t funny anymore.
He dislikes today’s music, television, and movies.
Grumph.
You’ve gotta throw a lot of birds to make a hole that big.
I was a little too slow with the camera and just missed the big pillow fight. It’s a shame, really. It would have been a fantastic photo.
The bee thinks it’s having lunch. The tree thinks it’s having sex.
Communication is difficult.