With the embargo lifted, the Cuban crocodile knows it’s just a matter of time and their plans will reach fruition. They’ve been patient this long. They wait a little longer.
All posts by Josh More
Giant Freshwater Prawn (Macrobrachium rosenbergii)
Giant freshwater prawns aren’t all that impressed with modern HDTV’s.
Bird Noir
The sharp knock at the door drew me from my stupor. Still half asleep, I knocked my whiskey bottle from my desk, and heard it shatter on the floor. “Great”, I thought, “unless that’s a client, last night will my last for a while”. It seemed harder and harder to make a living in this crazy town. There’s only so many cheating husbands for me to track, so many murders I could trace before the mob realized what I knew and came after me.
It was a hard line to walk. I couldn’t blame Tony’s organization outright, and the subtle hints I’d dropped went nowhere. No surprise, really, as Tony owned the cops too. I was beginning to suspect that he had also been behind the somewhat suspicious “disappearances” of some of my more recent cases … and clients. Maybe it was time to call it quits, escape this life and start over in Florida. It was warm in Florida. You didn’t find your clients floating down the river in Florida. Florida would be nice.
I opened the door to yell out “I’m retired”. Then I saw her. A bird no other. She kept her distance and wouldn’t look me in the eye. All she said was “I got your name from a friend. I don’t have anyone else to turn too”. Then she tossed a bundle of cash in my direction with “That should cover two weeks. Details are in the envelope.”
Then she flew away.
As I watched her fly, the wind moving over her feathers in a way I hadn’t in oh so long, and I thought, “One more. I’ll take one more case and then retire.”
Amur tiger (Panthera tigris altaica)
Now would be a bad time to be a pig.
#justsayin
White-cheeked Gibbon (Nomascus leucogenys)
This gibbon just realized that it’s been over a decade since we had a new episode of Star Trek.
Prairie Dog playing Hamlet
See you now;
Your bait of falsehood takes this carp of truth:
And thus do we of wisdom and of reach,
With windlasses and with assays of bias,
By indirections find directions out:
So by my former lecture and advice,
Shall you my son. You have me, have you not?
Eastern Spotted Newt (Notophthalmus viridescens)
In tonight’s episode of “The Nightly New(t)s”, this eastern spotted expresses surprise at the number of conservatives wishing to sleep with Caitlyn Jenner, seeing no other explanation for why humans care so much about what’s under clothing.
Burrowing Owl (Athene cunicularia)
What do you call a swimming baby owl?
A moist-owlette
How do we know that owls are smarter than chickens?
Ever heard of Kentucky-fried owl?
When does a Owl go “quack”?
When it is learning a new language.
What do you get when you put a bee in front of an owl?
A bowl!
What happened when the owl got a sore throat?
He didn’t give a hoot.
“Knock, Knock”
“Who’s there?”
“Who…”
“Who, who?”
“Who, who, who, who?”
“Who, who, who, who, who?”
“Who, who, who, who, who, who?”
“Who, who, who, who, who, who, who?”
“Who, who, who, who, who, who, who, who?”
What happened to the owl that fell in the well?
It got wet.
This owl doesn’t think any of these jokes are funny and is losing respect for you for laughing.
Bee
Not content with pointing out the flaw in calculation showing that bees couldn’t fly, this bee shows it can perform under load.
The Race
The race was on.
The enemies were approaching the hive and reinforcements were needed. Two hundred and twenty five meters was a long way, but it was necessary. The invaders must be stopped.
Only a quarter of the way and she was already getting tired. Still, the thought of the costs of her failure, drove her forward. Fifty thousand lives depended on her. And one two hundred and twenty five meters.
Glancing backward, she saw the invaders massing on the horizon and increased her speed. She realized she wouldn’t make it in time if she held anything back. She need not make the return trip. Conveying the message was enough. If the other hive could be alerted, they just might make it in time.
As she passed the three quarters point, she powered on, burning the last of her energy for the final stage of the race. She felt, deep in her body, that this was the end. When she reached her destination, she knew she’d just be able to deliver her message and, quite likely, collapse and die.
Death, however, was practically a guarantee in either case. If she stayed and fought, she would be slain with tens of thousands of others. If she was too slow, again, tens of thousands would die. If she just stopped, she might survive, but she might be the only one. No. Her only hope was to alert the others, in the hopes that they could help keep the total casualties low.
Though it may cost her life, she must fly.
American White Pelican (Pelecanus erythrorhynchos)
You forgot to depress the lever, didn’t you?
Dalmatian Pelican (Pelecanus crispus)
When put into Park, the pelican’s bill is locked in place, preventing accidental slippage. Before changing gears, it is imperative to depress the lever and safely unlock the bill. Otherwise, the bill can become damaged.
American Turkey (Meleagris gallopavo)
When forced to fight, the American turkey can deploy it’s razor-sharp feathers to help convince predators to pursue easier prey.
Throwback Thursday
These fish are clearly too spicy. They should be thrown back.
Arabian oryx (Oryx leucoryx)
When they’re young, to prevent accidental injury, oryx parents put corks on the horns of their children.
Emu (Dromaius novaehollandiae)
The closest I’ll likely get to photographing an emu tongue.
Meerkat performing The Tragedy of Dido Queene of Carthage
O sister, were you Empresse of the world,
Æneas well deserues to be your loue,
So lovely is he that where ere he goes,
The people swarme to gaze him in the face.
Sandhill Crane (Grus canadensis)
Reflection of crane reflecting on how the lack of Patellar reflexes in reflexive knees reflects upon his species.
Western Banded Gecko (Coleonyx variegates)
Western banded geckos are a common choice for beginner lizard climbers. This is largely due to the easy footholds, the relatively low slope and the easily accessible resting cave that can serve as a basecamp.
Brown Pelican (Pelecanus occidentalis)
“Water, water, every where, nor any drop to … hey, wait a minute!”