In infrared, sitatungas are patronuses.
Giraffe
Good mamas throw shade.
White Faced Whistling Duck
This duck wants grandchildren and doesn’t think it unreasonable to pressure her offspring to devote over a quarter of their lives to create new living beings so this duck can visit them for a couple hours every few months.
Antelope
This antelope doesn’t understand why humans don’t just force their elected officials to alternate each term with having to live on what the lowest paid worker earns.
Even-toed ungulates understand economic incentives.
Infrared Rawr
I’ve heard that if you stand still, they can’t see you.
They must have bumped into trees a lot.
Cape Buffalo
Cape buffalo realizing that a banjo made of gold would be ineffective at doing anything other than shining in the sun, so it couldn’t play “Wish that girl was mine”.
Bird
Bird realizing that Bob is not, in fact, his uncle, and now he has to reconsider everything of which he was previously sure.
African Crowned Crane
Crane sadly realizing that his entire species chose to evolve impractical ornamentation for mate selection instead of intelligence.
Crane really wanted to be an actuarial model researcher.
Coot
Water take-offs are more of a challenge than water landings.
African Bullfrog
African bullfrog contemplating the the similarities between lipid structures and rabies.
Answer: they’re both hydrophobic
((And if you were expecting a different sort of fat joke here, I don’t tell those.))
Mountains
Pretty sure Mordor is around here somewhere.
LA
It’s like they decorated LA for Christmas and then decided it would be too much work to take down the lights after.
Minneapolis
You could fit most of downtown Minneapolis in one of the metro’s lakes.
But please don’t.
La Brea Caracara
Caracaras mostly eat carrion. As only bones remain, the La Brea Caracara was apparently cannibalistic. This might be why they went extinct.
Fossil Bugs
Some people spend days painstakingly cleaning the tar off ancient beetles just to have museum visitors look at them and say “Oh. Bugs.”
This is where mad scientists come from.
Fossil Saber-toothed Cat
Thanks to the La Brea pits, we have a really good idea of what saber-toothed cats looked like.
Well, their insides, anyway.
CO2 Cycle
The La Brea museum did not make it clear, but I’m pretty sure this means that you can’t use carbon dating for time periods before bison existed.
Asian Small Clawed Otter
Otter thinking about how life is nothing but the memory of a stream of moments, the more of which you collect, the fewer there are yet to come.
Also, about fish.
Western Pond Turtle
This turtle stayed up all night worrying that insomnia and anxiety were going to make it hard to work today.
Meerkat performing Doctor Faustus
What art thou, Faustus, but a man condemn’d to die?
Thy fatal time doth draw to final end;
Despair doth drive distrust into my thoughts:
Confound these passions with a quiet sleep:
Tush, Christ did call the thief upon the Cross;
Then rest thee, Faustus, quiet in conceit.